A Tale of Two Cities

SOMEWHERE IN BERGEN COUNTY, NJ...

Yesterday, Emmy was home sick (again). We had a 10:30 doctor's appointment, and I promised her that if she was a very good girl, we could go get McDonald's and have a ride on the carousel at a local mall. She held up her end of the bargain, and off we went. Parking, for some reason, was hard to come by at said mall, so we ended up at a different entrance than I expected. We walked by one of my favorite stores, and there was a sale. Of course, you KNOW we got sucked right into the kids area, and $85 later, I had a warm-up and matching shirt for Emmy, 2 pairs of pants and 2 long sleeved, collared shirts for Ross, and a pair of leggings, matching skirt, and velour hoodie for Chloe (See? It really WAS a sale!!) On we went to McDonalds, where Emmy enjoyed her chicken nugget Happy Meal, complete with the most annoying toy ever, a penguin that kind-of yells at you when it detects your presence. When the sister was finished with her lunch, I hit the ATM to get cash for tokens for the carousel. Everything is a process, y'all. We hopped on the last ride before the sweet lady took her lunch break, stopped in the Apple store to price a gadget, and headed directly to the car so I could hit Target before picking the big kids up from school.

Exactly halfway back to the car, I realized I left my bag of purchases somewhere. Emmy and I backtracked to McDonalds, the carousel, the concierge desk, the ATM machine, the Apple store, and asked if anyone had turned in the bag. Nobody had. My receipt was inside the bag, so the person who "has" it can return to the store, get a credit, and purchase what they need/want. I truly believe whomever took a bag with $85 worth of clothing must have needed it more than I did. I am fine with that. And, I hope they enjoyed the $85 credit.

I spoke with my sister this morning and recounted my tale of woe about my missing bag of clothes, and she told me THIS story:

SOMEWHERE IN LAMAR COUNTY, TX:

Last week, she went to the gym. I hate her for that, too. :) She was in a hurry to get her son into his child care room and make her class, so she stuffed everything - coats, etc. - into a locker and went on her way. When she came back an hour later, she realized she left her purse wide open and sitting on the bench. That would cause a sense of panic in anyone, and as she looked through her wallet, she realized that nothing was missing!!! It sat wide open in a locker room at a busy gym for an hour and no one touched it.

Of course, I realize our stories could be reversed, and she would have lost a lot more than $85 worth of clothing. Here's the thing: I want to believe that anyone would return what doesn't belong to them. I want to believe that ALL parents teach their children the SAME values. I want to believe that my children will not be influenced by children who are thinking about making a bad decision. It just isn't the truth.

The truth is, it is much more difficult to do the right thing. It is even more difficult to do the right thing when others are trying to persuade you otherwise. Phrases like, "they'll never know" or "you won't get caught" or "I won't be your friend if you..." or "it's not THAT bad" are ones our children are innundated with. It is up to parents to teach them how to stand up for right in the midst of the wrong that goes on around them.

It really isn't about the missing bag of clothes. It is about the character of the person who now has it. I wonder if there is any guilt, or fear, or shame that comes with the choice that was made. I wonder if the lines between right and wrong are so blurred to this person that he/she just can't see that difference any more. And, I wonder if this is the beginning of a season of bad decisions that may lead this person down a destructive road.

I will probably never know. But, I never thought an $85 bag of clothing would get me to think about such things. And, I hope the person who now has it (or the credit) feels a bit of guilt every time he/she wears an item that is truly not theirs.